I think about stuff.
So that previous post, to me it seems like im painting the picture that my life was absolute torture and i had no fun and people should feel so sad and sorry for me, but no.
cause while i felt dying and kicking myself when i was studying the moment i got home i was watching shows and stuff so yeah. the entire experience/ day was not complete torture.
Now this seems like the most important thing, the biggest issue in my life, but few years down i would probably laugh and be like "HAHA i make it seem like torture, i had no idea how the world has actual bigger problems that finding a good place with mojo'
but cynical, memory ruining self, i shall choose to ignore you till later, when you do actually appear.
its just weird, like i have been doing this for 3 years and now, now of all times i feel like giving up.
The feeling to give up, the feeling of being so sian of studying did not come this strong before, before this time. like duh i've felt it, but this time when I felt it, it felt exceptionally strong.
These thing I feel, right now are the strongest emotions I have. In a few years, weeks, or even days, heck hours it may not matter as much. Because at the root we change, our perception changes. This feeling of being so lost, I may never feel that way ever again. Even if I do feel lost again, it will be different, it will be for different reasons and it will feel different.
Change is inevitable and not something we can stop.
You got a lot of time to act your age.
You can't write a book from a single page
but the hands on the clock only turn one way.
Run too fast and you'll risk it all
can't be afraid to take a fall
You turn, and I learn that the walls come falling down
Not a word, only heard what my friends could tell me now
