Puttin’ my defences up
'Cause I don’t wanna fall in love
If I ever did that
I think I’d have a heart attack
Never break a sweat for the other guys
When you come around, I get paralyzed
And every time I try to be myself
It comes out wrong like a cry for help
It's just not fair
Pain's more trouble than love is worth
I gasp for air
It feels so good, but you know it hurts
And I'm like (ow!) never thought it'd hurt so bad
Gettin' over you-ooh,
And (ow!) you're givin' me a heart attack
Missing you is all I'm thinking about, yeah
Everyone's tellin' me,
I'm just too blind to see,
How you messed me up, I'm better off now, yeah
Its been a rush of fluctuating feelings. Realise this post comes after a really really long hiatus.
Why? uhh not really sure but tired and lazy are probably somewhere in the list.
I really like the people at work, and the past week whenever they are like nice to me, im just cringe.
Why do they have to be so nice!? How am i suppose to leave then. There has been talk/mentions of me maybe extending, but honestly not sure about that. There is like so many things i have to consider.
Work has been making me think a lot. Especially after the ntu interns left and their like 'so what you gonna do after?' and i just stare at them and be all, 'ummm you know, actually I have no idea'
And the people i work with all have a university degree but their there, in QA.
Not where i wanna be, but i guess not all of us can really get what we want in life can we?
Why am I such a dreamer? I so badly want to just stay where I am, dreaming. But "time waits for no man" and we can't choose to ignore time either, it just does not work that way.
\Im glad that other people have found new things in life that makes them happy. I hope it lasts.
Let me dream for just a bit longer please? I don't want to wake up to see everything on fire.
