Its the things you see coming that somehow hurt the most
like you know its there is coming, but when it hits you got nothing
nothing to come back, nothing to feel
i was tired after production, slept finally
but it feels weird having time on my hands..
yesterday night was not what i imagined it to be...i expected more i guess
i'll remember all the dancing we did for warm-ups
i'll remember the happy smiles, the crazy times when i teared but was laughing
i hope i do, production taught me my memories not the best thing so..
i will miss everyone. guess the title the end proved right..
cause when its over it really is the end. we'll probably never see the whole bunch again together
im sure i'll miss the seniors
especially g, she was a great senior. i don know how she or others feel about it, but she was great
she's like what people aspire to be. we take her seriously yet we know when she wants to have fun
i remember her screaming that day, how she came backstage and apologise,
to apologise for something is tough, but its also shows how genuine she was.
luq well, umm i had the moments when i hated him, but last night suddenly it all went away.
it was like, he's my senior and he has done things for us and been there....
i just feel bad for them that they will have to sit down and listen to rene
actual production time:
im sorry julyn.. during rehearsals i was there helping you all the time, but when it actually mattered i somehow was missing? when they called us out for curtain call, i saw you come in and all i thought of was, crap i din put her dress out...
and your awesome by the way, to transition btw scenes and emotions... when im there like hurry change...blah blah blah
then had my scenes in btw, the artisstic was great, except when wayne got hurt.. uhhh ouch
my own actual scene im not happy with..till now i don't think my mind realised it was the actual thing and that i'd never get to do that again.
i still hate tmt thats not going to change
the morning was weird for me, i expected intensive rehearsal or stuff, but we were playing around
guess it will the last time huh, no more being so close to each other....not sure if i can still call syaf mummy....
its surprising how a group of people can go through such an experience together and bond soo much, but when the thing holding them together disappears, it dissolves.
the bond weakens.
gosh i talk like its already happened.. but honestly i don think im wrong to say it will
we won see each other that often, that bond will weaken..
its going to hurt when i go back to school and see the mundane people in my class.
wow no more kofu/bishan outings i suppose; bye 'usual' table
yeah now its just words but i'll feel it even stronger soon
i din do as well as i wanted to... i badly wanted to feel that high that day after humaira helped me.
i so desperately wanted to, the artistic scenes well the music is all the nudge i needed for the emotions. and yes so sorry wayne, i tried to steer you away from the block but sigh..
the seniors can tell me i did great and all but i know that to myself i could have done better\
im not sure which is worse, disappointing myself or others.
but well theres next production i will do my utmost best from the start.
ahahaha funny how going through one production makes you want to be in it even more...
for those skeptical about being in this one i bet feel otherwise now
oh how i will miss the current year 2.
they will come occasionally for drama; they have attachments so i can't really expect alot out of them
bye z.. you'll come but it won't be the same.. lately i have been trying to hug you more and longer but you got props and stuff to deal with so sigh.. after you become senior you have duties and like g said before your relationship with the juniors will change, we can't take your words for granted anymore..cause you have an image to project to us to future stagearts drama people. oh my god i'm going to miss you soo much.... i don know why but we don talk much but i feel close to you...and like i've mentioned i LOVE hugging you!!
after production rene talked to us... was out of it i guess..i remember what she said, but like i din register till hami said she was upset over it, then im like upset? for what ??
for those who screwed up or feel you din give your best.. let it be. we have the next time.
then shiftet props and costumes.. ahahahaha i eneded up with the broken rack, so was half carrying dragging it.... and luq din realise it was broken sad..
then we had to carry the whole thing and stuff kept dropping out..
oddly it was fun, well i was laughing..
then w came and was like your carrying it?? uh you hold this i carry. ahaaha obviously refused
then few steps ltr came the trolly yay left it with them and walked back
then transfer all the bags out.. sitting there when luq gave us food! yes... during curtain call everyone was like hungry.. then people packed and left. i was just sitting there.
i wondered like why are people leaving\can we not just sit for awhile and waste time\do they realise we may not get that together feel again\?
i badly wanted to just sit there and feel numb (okay i was tired too)
but s was like her bf and sis waiting for her.. and she don wan go first. so no choice had to leave.
i would do anything to go back and redo that moment.
okay i don't exactly know what that moment refers to, so lets say everytime spent with them
them being the ones i will cherish, the ones i don't have to see everyday to love.
them who when i see in sch i Will hug to death
lets live a life well wasted. hoping for the best yet expecting the worse
To the memories made.
